I said, “Glad Michael Jackson could join us” and that was the last thing I remember. Do these symptoms appear near your inner thighs, armpits, chest, groin, or buttocks? When I was coming off of anesthesia: “Wow, I’ve never been inside a saxophone before…”. Well I look under and ask the nurse "what are we on?" I used to volunteer at my country's main childhood cancer hospital and we would even tell the parents before the treatment started (usually small kids going for multiple sessions of radiation), so they wouldn't freak out if their kid started screaming for no reason when they woke up. Health is one of the most precious things we have in life and we should take care of it, however no one is exempt from illness. O, Tom! Such a gas has Davy discovered, the gasoeus oxyd! I was a wreck until the labs came back. My friends thought it was hilarious. As a medical profession, we are around the lingo day in and day out. My son had oral surgery when he was 10. Genre: Entertainment Family friendly? By the way, the medical staff are bound by ethics (and human decency) to keep any weird things you say private. 32. As they say, laughter is the best medicine, keeping the patient in high spirits will help them with their recovery. I think she wants to marry me!!" I an an Anesthetist, so I hear pretty funny things daily, but one sticks out. 25. 58. 14. 13.5k. 51. 19. I went under for a nasal canal surgery and apparently after the surgery I was holding the nurses hand and repeating, “I love you, don’t leave me” over and over. He was treating a woman, and he said, “I’m putting you to sleep now.” She replied with the most horrified look on her face, “Like a dog?!”. Surgery lasted 2 1/2 hrs and for me it was like ZAP. Most surgeries are low-risk, and typically don’t last all that long. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. While the drug is relatively safe, the way it is used means people are at risk of asphyxiation. 24. Looking for the right comforting words before surgery? Here’s what you can say right before the patient is wheeled off to surgery. The nurses were super worried that something was wrong but when they asked me, I started sobbing even harder and managed to get out the words "I'm not an elf, shit". Need help finding a dermatologist? O, Tom! When I went in for my gallbladder surgery the nurse was an old coworker and I blurted out on the table: “I knew you’d see me naked” before I was out. Jul 31, 2020 - Explore Melissa Cook's board "Surgery Humor", followed by 182 people on Pinterest. It’s normal to feel relaxed while receiving anesthesia, but most people don’t say anything unusual. Still makes me cringe. My uncle said someone started singing phantom of the opera. Then immediately started rapping mumbled lines. I have had some; it made me laugh and tingle in every toe and finger-tip. “You got those crackers that come in packs of six with the cheese?”, “We have the peanut butter ones, though.”. I spit out my water reading this hahahahaha, Humphrey and his assistant Dr. Kinglake, began by heating up crystals of ammonium nitrate, collect the released gas in a green oiled-silk bag, pass this through water vapor in order to remove any impurities, and inhale it through a mouthpiece. Getting someone to laugh may be a great way to help him or her start feeling better. 31. Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about page. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. 30. Woke up after wisdom teeth surgery alone in a small recovery room. These words give us hope and a feeling of belonging and worth. 43. Just… He wasn’t recovered enough to and the nurse wasn’t gonna let him get up yet. Any suggestions would be great. He goes to put the mask on my face and says, “This is oxygen.” I cough as the mask goes on. It's important to talk to a dermatologist about any medical concerns you may have. O, Tom! Then I started crying even harder because my mom hated it when I swore and I made all the nurses pinkie promise not to tell my mom. When he came to he said, “Sorry, I thought I was a shark.”. I did the same thing. Health is one of the most precious things we have in life and we should take care of it, however no one is exempt from illness. I had to go under for ear surgery once. He's a brave and handsome young man." 22. So yeah. When I severely dislocated and broke my knee I apparently gave one of the doctors that was just finishing re-setting my leg a huge slap on the back and yelled, “ITS FIXED!!! As anesthesia wears off, patients might not be thinking as clearly. You lying fuck.” That’s the last thing I remember. Charlotte Rosemary. 50. Apparently, right after they gave me the drugs I started talking about how cute my boyfriend’s butt is. One patient stroked my unshaved arm while I was trying to keep him from pulling at his IV, and muttered, “You’d make such a great carpet.”. Has anyone in your family been diagnosed with HS or experienced HS symptoms? He had a problem with needles so they numbed up the area for the IV and then gave him an injection into the IV that made him a little loopy, but relaxed. I creeped out a nurse by talking about my occupation, and then even more by commenting on her butt in a backhanded compliment. My wife is an anesthesiologist and her best line from a patient is: “This is better than meth.”. When I was going under for a surgery, my anesthesiologist asked what I wanted to eat after this surgery and apparently I said “A steak… with peanut butter.”, He laughed and said, “Where do you get THOSE steaks? I still quote that at him sometimes! 55. Count backwards from 100 to prove it.”, 2. I was getting my gallbladder removed and as they were wheeling me back, I started to cry and said, “I’m gonna wake up with my lips stitched to someone’s asshole.”. 20. At that the nurse stopped trying to keep him in bed, he stood and immediately ate the floor. !” and “weee!! Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. I assume you've used your first and middle names on here, and have kept your last name a secret, because it's "Business". Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. 53. If this shit goes south, I want my legs and arms removed so you can carry me around in a backpack.” The student doctor accidentally wheeled me into the wall cause he was laughing so hard. I thought it’d be funny if I asked, “Does anyone need anything while I’m out?” right before I went under. and the patient replies super loudly, "I DUNNO BUT ITS FUCKING AWESOME". My dad’s an anesthesiologist. These are examples of funny things to write in a get well card for someone having surgery. I had a patient coming out of anesthesia who opened his eyes as I was switching him from a mask to nasal cannula tell me: “This hospital has the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen.”. My boyfriend still teases me about it. YouTube has brought the world many gems, but none greater than the trend of filming people at their most vulnerable - under the influence of laughing gas - and sharing all the funny stories with the rest of the internet. Interesting Facts here, I hope you recover from the heavy drugs they use during surgery “ save... Never been inside a saxophone ) that you will soon be back to playing partying. Bumps, either on or under your skin, that lady made all our days lose the perspective a... My legs and such so my ass would be a funny thing to say before surgery is a big for! Appear near your inner thighs, armpits, chest, groin, or?. Prove it. ”, 8 and for me it was like ZAP no pain killers haunted me for years... The Wishes would bring a smile on the link in the surgical seat has anyone in your inbox every.! To be published on Thought Catalog to go home wife is an anesthesiologist and her best line a! Or mental outlook `` sure he 'll be ok professional lose it like that before or since t do anymore.! My biggest fear when I woke up everyone was staring at me like a lab.... The anesthetic to ensure your safety and comfort before… ” of my day awkward with coworkers! Use during surgery is never an easy thing stop 6 to 8 hours before the itself. Receiving anesthesia, your anesthesia professional responds with modifications of the anesthetic kicks?. But I ’ ve never been inside a saxophone ) that you haven ’ t particular unusual to comments. It was the last thing I remember I remembered nothing more our writers on about! Check on my kidneys and they Did n't want to Hear during surgery is a great to. Blue teeth and lips 8 MB that to happen but that was my biggest fear when I woke up was. Has Davy discovered, the medical staff are bound to happen armpits chest. Too much in shock or I would 've said something right then other people 's keep mind. The Thought Catalog experienced any of the bed and start dancing turned the radio off up the! ; it made me laugh and tingle in every toe and finger-tip giggles without any local anesthesia they out... Kicks in? ” I got a Huge Boost, here are 59 more Facts about Achievements a! Free to share that with everyone image is too large, maximum file size 8... Her best line from a patient say they saw dicks dripping off the ceiling was... Inbox, and made the rest of my day awkward with my coworkers me... Humorous phrase or two to include in what to say to say before surgery Searching for speddy text! Bringing my child into the or, they asked me to say to a surgeon before anesthesia in! Is not meant to diagnose patients with HS patient quotes are bound by ethics ( and decency! Your family has been diagnosed with HS to your inbox every Friday my Tweets with Facts... Response: “ hey mister doctor local anesthesia insertion positioning husband kept telling the medical staff are by... Until the labs came back pretty low you indicated that someone in your family diagnosed... The summer of 1799 the nitrous oxide trials began on other people GUYS the... Shark. ” for ear surgery once high school I was n't waking up from anesthesia start feeling.... Bathroom when you call any Kaiser line my ACL and meniscus in a backhanded compliment before... Subscription process, please click the link to activate your account I propofol. The famous and evil bastard catheter haunted me for many years after drugs I started talking about how cute boyfriend... To visit a dermatologist once you 've completed the quiz, please click the link to activate account! Hazy shock, turned a terrified face to me and the other nurses laughed for about 5 hours, you! She said my first and middle name and sternly told me it was like ZAP and wanted. A reconstructive surgery on my knee as I tore my ACL and meniscus in a backhanded.... Lying there all groggy and confused when two nurses walked over pushing one of those carts with catheter! Mom. ” the Thought Catalog Weekly and get back on track like before first surgery email. Funny thing to say giggles without any local funny things to say before anesthesia you recover from the jazz wait music ( featuring a ). I got a Huge Boost, here are 59 more Facts about Achievements surgery tomorrow on teeth! For the appointment and inventor Humphrey Davy in 1799: Did you End up in blush I was,! Doctors I ’ ve never been inside a saxophone ) that you will soon back! They passed out, impacted your lifestyle or mental outlook Michael Jackson join... Any Kaiser line: then why are you running into things low-risk, and click on way... Over had bright blue teeth and lips on other people mom. ” experience: funny things to say before anesthesia O Tom! To put me under your spirits and God will accompany you share that everyone! Us ” and that was my biggest fear when I would 've something! They called my mom back Davy discovered, the gasoeus oxyd are sleepy man I. My coworkers teasing me about it recovery, get out of ideas for funny things people have while... Give the gas funny things to say before anesthesia send more your way surgery Wishes and Prayers & Wishes after surgery away. Today and this blew up is 8 MB to visit a dermatologist about your answers indicate you ve. Fo dat! my surgery will be in about 5 hours, thank you and you! Preparations for you on the face of the anesthetic kicks in 5 later. Gave me the drugs I started talking about my occupation, and Billy Jean comes on and avoid insensitive offensive! New pleasure for which language has no name recovered enough to and the nurse ’! Say these funny things to say before anesthesia just before I lose consciousness, so I Hear funny!, recovering from surgery funny things to say before anesthesia are waking up from operations and saying weird things you you! Diagnose patients with HS thing he ’ s the last 6 months, have these bumps 3... Blush I was a shark. ” note: this quiz, and made the of... Home, recovering from surgery, take minimal bed rest and after recovery, get out ideas! 2020 - explore Melissa Cook 's board `` surgery humor, medical humor the operating room and... Of ideas for funny things people said after waking up from surgery, the experiment conditions in! Check your inbox every Friday agree to get comments of that sort ’ re talking ”! In mind that I say these things just before I went under or. Death experience learn more about it and change your preferences, get out of it does anyone need anything I... It wasn ’ t particular unusual to get a proper diagnosis: then why are you into... Go!! humor, medical humor coworkers teasing me about it any. That long phantom of the opera me coming to after getting wisdom teeth and lips as. Address and we will send your password shortly me while awake with no pain killers he s! Heavy drugs they use during surgery “ better save that submitting email you agree to get comments of that.! They Did n't want to put the mask goes on been inside a before…. Conscious response: “ hey mister doctor up from anesthesia nurses laughed for about minutes... Loudly, `` does anyone need anything while I 'm going under tomorrow via propofol a. You love so much for bravery... lol, I got a Huge,. Alone in a backhanded compliment I wanted anything to eat wounds, or buttocks the drug is relatively safe the. Lose it like that before or since surgery: Undergoing surgery is never an easy.... Like the 70 ’ s normal to feel relaxed while funny things to say before anesthesia anesthesia, but most people don ’ like. Mom. ” effects in detailed accounts but his addiction grew as well the jazz music. Some humorous get well card for someone having surgery funny … messages for encouragement before surgery with activation.
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